Marriage Without The Commitment?

Ok I will admit it, sometimes I don't feel married. But then again, what is feeling married supposed to feel like? I think a huge part of marriage is being able to be emotionally and physically there for your spouse.The thing about getting married in prison, is that it is very anti-climactic. You have this wonderful ceremony and visit afterwards, and then you are torn away from each other. There is no house or apartment, no settling into sharing a space, meals together, cuddling at night, falling  asleep in his arms. There are no dinners out, no walking to the park hand in hand, no family meals. It is prison, and me here alone at home. It is only being able to see my husband for 2 hours a month. No wonder I don't feel married at times! I catch glimpses into my friend's married lives and they seem to be moving forward...making homes together, preparing for children, heck I'm even jealous when they get to go grocery shopping together. You see them working as a team, a unit, but then I think to myself, Isaac and I are a unit, a team. We just deal with different scenarios.But am  secretly ok with not having to deal with all the above mentioned things? Would I worry I would fail at our relationship if it were more of a "real" marriage?

Despite the distance and the limited time together, a type of monitored love, we still make things work though, we still maintain a very strong relationship and we have good communication. No we don't have a sex life. No we don't have endless time to sit and chat. Yes we both are very lonely while ironically being married. I believe the commitment still exists in such a marriage as this. Prison marriages in my eyes take an even higher level of commitment in some sense. So at times, I have left feeling torn. Half the time I feel like I took the cheap way out getting married while he is still in prison, so I could experience marriage essentially without the outward commitment, but then I think that real commitment is the ability to stand by my husband through thick and thin, through this whole ordeal, to get to know his ins and outs in creative ways. To find intimacy in simple things. Yes we get to skip the petty arguments over money and cleaning the house, but there is always an exchange. So what is it? Is it marriage without the commitment or is is marriage with commitment on steroids?