Awkward and Ashamed?

So I went out to dinner with my best friend (he is a guy), and had a good time, but was introduced to a somewhat awkward situation. I live in a small town and so when we go out to eat, the waitresses know us and we see them often. We are all very friendly, but have never gotten past the superficial conversation stage. Well today the restaurant was pretty dead, so my friend and I were chatting with the waitresses for a bit. One asked about my wedding ring set. It was at this moment that we realized that everyone there thought that WE were married. This has happened before and we always find it amusing, especially since he is gay and I am already married, but it ended up bringing the conversation to an awkward place eventually.

This assumption was confirmed by one of the waitresses later on. I had been talking to her about her upcoming wedding and she was talking to me about my wedding and then of course it got awkward because I don't always like to give prison wedding facts to people I don't know very well. I always start stumbling all over my words. I want to make it clear that I am not ashamed of my husband and his situation, but my best friend doesn't like my husband very much, and I had no idea how these ladies would take the news that my husband is incarcerated. I think part of the problem was that I was enjoying a "normal" evening out and then somehow prison had to enter into it, but that is always the case. I try and do all these normal activities, but it remains a lonely journey because Isaac is not here to experience these things with me. I want to be at dinner with him and chatting it up with others, or able to show people a pic of him when he is not in a jumpsuit. There is always this little thing nagging me saying, "your life is not like others." I was being shown loving pictures of kids, boyfriends, fiances, etc...by the waitresses and I felt so left out. To make a long story short one of the waitresses asked why my husband was not with me and what kind of wedding I had, etc...when I finally awkwardly came clean, I knew there were assumptions and confusion. For some reason I felt almost wrong because I had told the truth. Did I feel ashamed? Maybe a little bit, but not of my husband, just of having to always have an explanation for the circumstances of my life. They stared at me with the usual face, a cross between disbelief and a tad disdain, almost as though I was so naive and being secretly taken for a ride by "a criminal." This is the man I love, the man I choose to be with, to wait for, but sometimes it is just so difficult to live this lifestyle. I know I don't have to explain why my husband is not here, or give an explanation for why I am always with my male best friend instead of my husband, or why I don't have children or family pictures to show, etc...I could go on and, but then again do I? Do I owe people an explanation? It is just one of those days where I feel as though I have done something wrong being married to an incarcerated man. It is really true that the family does pay in many ways too. I found myself wondering what if they tell people about Isaac being away? The whole town will know, etc..but the truth of the matter is the whole town probably knows anyway, and if they don't what does it matter if they find out? I guess it matters logistically or maybe people's opinions do matter to me more than I care to admit...Am I awkward? Yes. Am I ashamed at times? Honestly I don't know...I think I am ashamed of not being confident in my own life and myself when it comes to the whims of others.